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Reason
This diary entry is from someone who is in serious emotional pain and has written that they feel like harming themselves. This is a mental health crisis that needs immediate attention.
What the diary says (translated from Hinglish):
- Constant anxiety, panic attacks over small things
- Always wants to leave wherever they are; feels depressed at home, so goes out directly
- Gets very restless; rides around in the car so family won't see them upset
- Anxiety hasn't gone away since exams
- To escape anxiety, made more wrong decisions, everything piled up - "it's just all messed up"
- "I'm not able to live normally"
- Not happy even for a single moment
- Even the gym doesn't feel good; lost 12 kg last year, then gained it all back
- "I'm just so f***ing exhausted"
- Today was unbearable - has been crying since morning
- "I feel like harming myself. I'm so scared."
This is a crisis. Please act now.
The last lines - feeling like harming themselves and being scared of that feeling - indicate active suicidal ideation or self-harm urges. The fact that they wrote "I'm so scared" shows they do NOT want to act on it - that is a call for help.
If this is you:
You are not broken. You are exhausted, overwhelmed, and have been carrying this alone for too long. The fear you feel about your own thoughts means part of you wants to be safe. Please reach out right now:
- iCall (India): 9152987821
- Vandrevala Foundation 24/7: 1860-2662-345
- AASRA: 9820466627
- iCall online chat: icallhelpline.org
If this belongs to someone you know: Please go to them right now, stay with them, and gently encourage them to call one of the numbers above or take them to a hospital.
You - or they - deserve support, not suffering alone. This level of pain is treatable. Please reach out.
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